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Sunday, August 22, 2004

Relationships and Personality - A Forum: "Call me Cat. I%27m 55 years old. I%27ve been on a veterans pension and social security disability for my mental illness for nearly 20 years. The crazy thing of it is that I was never told what was wrong with me%21 I was told I had something called atypical manic depression. It was only through the Internet that I learned about personality disorders and how they applied to me. Now from what I hear and read Borderline personality disorder %28bpd%29 is seen as a controversial diagnosis. I%27ve seen it referred to as a wastebasket diagnosis. The idea is that it is used when nothing else is apropriate. I%27ve seen quotes from doctors where they say they would not tell a patient that they had bpd. They say it is not really an illness. I%27ve also seen where it was considered incurable. It was a diagnosis used to segregate patients. %22Don%27t get involved with him. He%27s a borderline.%22 I guess I%27m trying to create a top 10 reasons of why the mental health community has treated me the way they have. I realize I bear some responsibility. There was always a new fad to latch onto - Transactional analysis%2C assertiveness training%2C codependency. I know I am not going to get anywhere by dwelling on my resentments. I have to figure out where I am going to go from here. One of the descriptions I like the best of bpd is that I have my emotional thermostat turned up too high. I am either idealizing people or devaluing them. I think this little paragraph has been a good first step in dealing with my situation. Thanks for listening"

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eureka, California, United States
As Popeye once said,"I ams what I am." But then again maybe I'm not